Monday, December 28, 2009 8:12 PM
Almost lost it again... dislike myself when it happens...
Held back... that voice again... ringing in my head...
I must pull myself back on track... it doesn't matter...
As what sunday service pastor mention... count our blessings!!
I must rem to count my blessings! When there is hurt.. there will always be a blessings as we grow stronger with it! i juz have to keep this in mind.. when e going gets tough, there is always sunshine after e rain!! :)
tough times dun last, tough pple do....
When u are blessed... share the blessings... be a blessing to others... and that is when the blessings multipfied...
Sunday, December 27, 2009 12:48 AM
Facebook Post...
On this day, God wants you to know...
... that you are to trust yourself. If you do not, then you will forever be looking to others to prove your own merit to you, and you will never be satisfied. You will always be asking others what to do and at the same time resenting their help. Trust in yourself starts... with being ok with the consequences of your decisions.
The outcome is what i shall bear....
Saturday, December 26, 2009 6:42 PM
Was reading blogger Dawn Yang's latest entry on Tiger Wood's scandalous cheating affairs...
I have to agree with one thing she wrote...
"P.P.S:
If you want to find a man who won't cheat on you, find a man who won't
cheat on God."
Hands up agree...
Friday, December 25, 2009 10:41 PM
First christmas with my baby boy.. :) enjoyable and filled with surprises!!
Had a quiet christmas eve with Jovan till my family came back at night!! Sis, bro and his gf all bought jovan prezzies!! so sweet of them!! :)
Jovan's prezzies... :) e ones wrapped up are from my bro n his gf.. and the kiddo sunglasses are from my sis! lolz..
Jovan wif his Yi Yi... haha...
tryin to be cool.. but.. err... lolz.. he simply looks adorable in his pink sunglasses!!
another way to wear his sunglasses.. :p
Picture cards from bro n his gf...
Jovan playin with his fake milk bottle.. lolz..
Are u lookin at me droolin??!!!
Christmas day itself is partyin at Rowie's hse!! Jovan was a guai guai kiddo.. after his feed at ro's place, he drift off to la la land!! lolz.. allow mama, aunties and an uncle to play wii.. :p
Jovan's xmas gifts from HOPE aunties!!
from rowie!! :) i love the msg on the pillow..
A blessed xmas in year 2009!
Wednesday, December 23, 2009 10:18 PM
Wuhahaha.. today is the adventure of e Pig and her baby Cow!! :) Today is the very first attempt in bringing Jovan out to Tampines for a frenz' gatherin! :) or shd i say a bedok-silkair-mummies mini gathering! lolz...
Meet up with charine and jolene for lunch and some shoppin at Tampines mall!! 2 very preggy women! Both beautiful ladies are expecting tiger babies.. realli lookin forward to their little ones' arrival! :) and Charine is real nice.. came all e way to fetch me n jovan!!
Kind of nervous yet excited about today.. coz it will be e first time i'm bringin jovan out without any family members! well.. things turn out okie dorkie though jovan pulled many stunts on me! Had to feed jovan at the cafe... spit out his milk on charine's dress... poo-ed at Tampines One... made Mummy changed his diapers at the nursing room... cried while shoppin 4 his things... :) i survived!! Proud as i am.. lolz..
Got a few clothes for him as were on offer.. and a mini fan tat can be attached to his baby cot or stroller!! i always enjoy buyin jovan's stuff.. much more than pamperin myself with gifts! lolz.. speakin of gifts!! my fren got me Victoria's Secret Velvet Amber Blackberry pefume from NYC to cheer me up! it was certainly a pleasant surprise.. i juz heart the fragance and the package!
CHIO??? haha...
Can't wait for Fri.. xmas celebration at rowie's place! It is realli nice of her in providin her place for HOPE gathering once again.. :) it will be a potluck celebration!! hmm will be bringing chix wings! lolz.. excited as will be celebratin xmas wif great company and my precious baby boy.. woo hoo!
well.. can't realli meet everyone for xmas!! My aussie fren is in sin for this these days before he will be flyin to indonesia to spend xmas with his family... but i wun be able to meet up with him!! made plans and is hard to ask my mum or sis to babysit jovan as all have their own activities! but is alright... there will be other chances!! :)
feeling blessed today.. :) I juz hope that this feeling will go on...
Tuesday, December 22, 2009 7:58 PM
Now is my true sunshine... The sunshine that GOD had in mind for me...
Finally walked out of his place... finally made the first real step in moving on... determined not to turn ard for it is the better for all.. best for me and my little boy! Though movin back home might not be the most ideal path, but it is the path tat gives me the most confidence in moving on in life! May GOD back me up in this choice.. or otherwise, show me the right path tat i shd take...
The stress and agony during these few mths is smthing i cannot describe... this whole year of 2009 is smthing tat i wanna throw out of my head... but i noe it will stay! it will forever be at the back of my head and i juz have to bear wif it! Hoping it will better thru time!! hence the best way is always to accept it... come to terms with it... and seek e best way to live with it! May GOD give me the wisdom and a forgiving heart to walk out of his shadows as "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength" -Phil. 4:13
At times i would wanna know what is going on in his life.. but deep inside, there is a voice telling me, "Does it matters?!" This tiny voice had been inside me for so long... and it is getting louder each day.. and now i heard it! Loud and clear.. and now i can safely say, "IT DOESN'T MATTER..." He will still do what he does... if he can do it to one.. no one can gurantee he wun do to the next.. or the next following one... life is upredictable! so are human beings.. tat is y we are weak by ourselves! Always changing minds.. always having second tots.. always having self doubts.. always having regrets... always indecisive... always suspicious.. and the list goes on n on!!! But i believe we can decide things thru HIM! Juz like what e senior pastor said during one of his sermon that love between a couple is nv a bed of roses... love between earthly beings nv last... but one thing we can do is to CHOOSE TO LOVE AND NOT LET LOVE CHOOSE U! CHOOSE TO REMAIN FAITHFUL! CHOOSE TO DO THE RIGHT THINGS! Life on earth is so short... uncertainities can last a lifetime... so y bow down to them?! :)
The pain and hurt will be the gentle reminders of GOD's fiery and strict ways while his miracles and quiet whispers will be the grace and love in my life... in jovan's life... the day i cried in front of HIM with Jovan inside me, i knew i will have to walk in his ways. HE is always blessing me with people ard me.. giving the support at timely intervals... giving me strength bit by bit.. giving me challenges to always prepare me for e next.. Till what i am today! I can feel i am growing stronger.. though i am far from what HE wants me to be, at least i am determined to be that angel worthy of his guidance.
Everyting happen for a purpose! We can live in regrets.. we can dwell in agony... we can immerse in sadness... but no used questioning mistakes that were already done for i believe mistakes happened for a reason! I shall constantly seek e reason and hold it dearly to me! Even if Jovan is a mistake.. he is a beautiful mistake... a perfect mistake tat i am willing to bear! i no longer see Jovan as part of him... i see Jovan as a part of me! Wuhahaha.. to be exact... a part of my flabby tummy.. :p
Deep inside.. i noe... i believe... 2010 will be a better year... will be the best year... :)
May GOD shower me with sunshine always... the sunshine tat HE deem i deserve...
Wee Wee
