Saturday, July 25, 2009 11:20 PM
过了一天。。。
痛了一天。。。
我已累了。。。
没回应您的sms。。。
并不是要惹你生气。。。
而是不知如何回答。。。
也不想说谎话。。。
我知道我不应该问些我不想知道的事情。。。
所以我选择了安静。。。
这对大家都好。。。
心里的痛就有自己来忍受。。。
当我看到明天的太阳时。。。
也许会好过一些。。。
1:20 AM
SOS!! Help me.....
Is nose bled one of preggy symptoms??!!
Having it again... second time this week...
been drowning myself with fluids juz in case heaty...
sick and tired of tat bloody smell in my nose...
And the kicking goes on n on n on....
Tuesday, July 21, 2009 11:14 PM
it is tiring to be keep up a strong front when everything ard u is crashing down...
everyday u hear things u dun wanna hear...
or see things u dun wish to see...
i juz wanna take a long nap... where i dun need to worry about stuff...
coz i am realli exhausted...
Saturday, July 18, 2009 10:50 PM
LOLZ!! Went checkup ytday and was a guinea pig for my doc 4D scanning machine!! He manage to catch a 4D image of jovan's face... and printed it out!! Yoo hoo... rowie who accompanied me for my checkup was also excited! :)
All of jovan's features are formed liao... haha... i can see his eyes (his eyes are closed), nose, ears and mouth! lookin at the pic... rowie n my mum say jovan has my mouth!!! lolz... which is kinda cool! *thick-skin* i am sure jovan will have a nice smile coz his mum has a nice smile! evil luff...
And i think jovan has his dad's nose... :)
Handsome Jovan... winks....
Thursday, July 16, 2009 9:47 PM
Been burying myself in the TWILIGHT novel series! got the MPH twilight 4 novels collection on impulse but no regrets at all... i am enjoying every single chapters of the novels. think i read till i get too involved in the story! starting to feel for some characters... and at times, i juz felt i am drawn into the worlds of vampires and werewolves! HAHA kind of disturbing i would say...
As i was reading the chapter about the werewolf sam, emily and leah... i juz felt the story seems to be describing my very own story! Leah is me, he's sam and she's emily... we fit in beautifully into these characters (okie.. juz onli leah is not a pregnant woman!! sweats! lolz!!)... the experience they been through is forgetable yet compared to the story of others, it is so insignificant.
Juz like what yaya told me... when the hurt is fresh, u will find every love song... every love story reflecting ur very own tots or experience! When u stop feeling this way, it can also show tat u have moved on.. or at least not rooted to the past...
Many people say i changed... i become a more careful person... they dislike the pauses between conversations. They felt as if i am choosing my words too carefully... honestly i din realize i am doing tat... or they are juz being sensitive!??
was on msn with a fren... and he said...
fren: Wah... i miss the old u when i see ur pic
me: wuhahaha... referring to my size??
fren: last time u more cheerful... more touchable...
LOLZ... before anything... touchable means approachable ah!! plz dun think the other colourful way! :p
did i realli change to tat bad??!! is smthing i cannot judge myself...
Others say to me...
"if you dun let go, i am afraid u will nv find happiness again..."
"I dun wan u to be weighed down by all these... i still believe u have much more in u to give to the next person u love..."
I keep pondering... i keep thinking.... how to answer them! :) then i realize i can onli give them one answer... JOVAN... :) my happiness... and my true love..
Friday, July 10, 2009 3:19 PM
Feeling tired when it is onli 3 pm... onli half of today is gone!!!
I got a feeling the third trimester symptoms are coming... fearful...
Exhausted physically and mentally... emotionally draining as well...
Saw Jovan did a mini kallang wave from his "nest"...
he seems to be telling me, "MAMA I AM COMING!!! WELCOME ME!"
WOWOWOWOWO... my mind went blank...
Thinking of labour pain!!
and did i mention this before... nosebled... 3rd time... not gd not gd!!! :/
Wednesday, July 8, 2009 1:14 PM
Received an email from my poly fren about a 2 yrs old female beagle up for adoption!! When i saw the pictures, i went HUH! She looks like momo... dunno is it due to the assemblance that i took an instant liking to her!
Scrolled down to see the message in the email... and realized if no one adopt the beagle called Snoopy by today, she will be put to zzz by SPCA. Immediately i juz felt i need to do something!! GOSH she is onli 2 yrs old... perhaps i am out of my mind... i sms a few frenz thru msn and sms that i felt there is a possibility that they would be able to adopt. True enough... 2 of them seemed interested, hence quickly sms the email sender to delay the date of putting Snoopy to zzzz!
Thanks GOD! The sender replied and say Snoopy's owner came to claim her and now she is back home where she belongs! GOSH... words can never described how relieved i am! GOD performed wonders!! I realli cannot imagine Snoopy is put to zzz....
Have the sudden urge to hug snoopy... LOLz... what a lucky doggie she is... :)
Sunday, July 5, 2009 12:54 PM
Stupidity seems to be something that is inborn in me...
i juz can't seem to get e picture...
Onli when the hurt comes that i will remember but when hurt fades away gradually, it returns!
Perhaps i should juz stay away... for the better for all....
Even to this stage, i am juz being plain stupid....
I guess GOD juz make me this way...
And thanks for reminding me this fact... :)
Saturday, July 4, 2009 10:13 PM
What is happening to me...
have nosebled again!!
Hopefully is nothing serious...
Perhaps too heaty...
sianz!!!
Friday, July 3, 2009 10:19 PM
Baby Jovan and Mama Jan wanna zzzz...
But can't... outside very noisy....
Little somersaults and dizzy spells....
Hide in the room also no used...
Little kick and big yawn...
Can zhou gong gong come claim us to dreamland?
zZzz ZZzz ZzzZZz....
7:19 PM
Two days of FOC work at fren's child care center has proven to be a little too much for my body to take!! Got home to experience some dizzy spells and some gastric discomfort... and ended up vomiting out my lunch!! Wasted... it was a treat from my fren + boss of the center! I guess i pushed myself a little too much for a pregnant woman.. plus it had been a long time since i last worked such long hrs!! Carrying crying infants... feeding active 2 or 3 yrs old... wow is no easy task!! But no regrets volunteerin myself! When u see those angelic and innocent faces, u wun even noe u are tired! LOLZ!! The moment i sat in my fren's car then onli can i feel the tiredness creeping onto me. will my little jovan be as adorable as them?? I hope so wor... cute as baby tom tom and as smart as little Jose! :)
Speakin of Jose... think this little kiddo is the gem in everyone's eyes!! Haha.. he so intelligent for his age!! And he such a fast learner! i was teaching him the sounds of animals.. example cat will meow.. next min.. he was pointing at a picture of a cat and saying " cat goes meow meow!" GOSH! i am impressed! he was also the first one to get up from his afternoon nap... then he went round sayanging his frenz on the cheeks, saying "Get up get up!! Come and play..." GOSH! my heart melted! When the lights were turned on to show tat nap time is over.. he jumped up and say "YEAH! Can play..." LOLz... what a gem... i also starting to wonder shd i name my baby boy jose instead?! LOLZ...
Each time i see those innocent faces, my heart aches for my own baby boy!! He deserves the best but now he can onli settle for the best his mum and dad can offer to him! Perhaps the best he and i can offer is sufficient enough for Jovan to be blessed... guess it is smthing tat i can onli believe and have faith in! At times i feel that i am juz selfish... but perhaps being selfish may benefit Jovan in some way! Sometimes i wonder does he realli care but i am not in a position to judge anything and who am i to interfere?! I should juz stay within my limits and channel my energy to more meaningful things. well.. is is realli easier said than done! I realize that i dun have much tears left for myself... but plentiful for Jovan.. so when will i truely be happy and settled?! Maybe soon ba... when the time comes, i supposed i will noe... :)
Sighz... enough of such disheartened tots!! Maybe my dizzy spells are making me so negative! Argh!! Negative tots go away ah....
Oh my mum FINALLY felt baby Jovan's super kicks!! for the past few attempts, whenever my mum place her hand on my tummy, Jovan stop his kungfu kicking! He play guai guai lor! Then later start his nonsense kicking! WUHAHA... his kicks seems to be getting more powerful each week and definitely more painful! i can also feel my skin stretching with occasional cramps... tummy begin to feel heavy! i realli cannot imagine myself at full term... err.... 107 days to go...
And i dunno what the hell got into my mum last night!! She kept toking about labour pains and what i can expect! i hear till i can almost imagine out the pain and agony physically... my lower body start to have strange cramps! LOLZ... but i'm sure i juz imagining stuff la! a few days ago, my frenz were asking me whether giving birth pain or not?! what e heck... how would i noe! i am a first time mum... well give me 107 days more! i will be able to tell them then... sweats!!!
Before i end this entry... i juz like to welcome my pal back to town! LOLZ... Been staying in France for so long... hence i supposed tis time he is back for good ba! no matter what... WELCOME HOME IS! :)
Okie okie.. i tink i better go have my dinner and later an early night zzz.... hope i wun vomit my dinner out too!! sianz...
Heading spinning... spinning... round and round.... :/
Wednesday, July 1, 2009 7:53 PM
Kick kick... kick... kick...
That little thing is kicking non-stop....
Kicking up my irritation liao...
AH.....
Wee Wee
