Saturday, August 29, 2009 11:07 PM
Too many quarrels ard me... giving me the headaches...
Guess i am the onli one at home without any one to quarrel wif...
Oops... think there is 2 people at home with no one to quarrel wif...
Jovan and his mummy...
Hoping for an invitation to get out of the house...
Too much negativity in the house...
True enough.. Sms came...
But midnight bak chor mee at block 85 isn't ideal...
Turned down offer... so now in a daze...
2 people in a daze....
3:06 PM
Unable to zzz well the whole of last night.. onli manage to get some solid zzz at dawn! Been dreaming endlessly last night.. nightmares!! Think the worst i ever had...
i had so many nightmares... but i rem my last one most vividly...
I was chasing after a man... told him to stop but he din...
He juz pulled his luggage and walked away...
i ran after him but he din stop at all...
He went onto the descending esculator and finally he turned back at me and gave me a crooked smile...
I din like tat smile at all...
i chased onto the esculator... tripped... rolled down...
As i hit the floor i realize i lost my baby... but there was no pain...
I rem tat man then came to look at me as i closed my eyes...
This is when i woke up... very disturbing dream!! i get up and feel my bloated tummy!! Jovan is still kickin inside.. relieved!! At times when jovan stay perfectly still, i will get paranoid! will 'disturb' him by poking my tummy.. lolz...
Told my mum about the dreams... she cried... she dun feel gd about it...
sighz if i knew she would get smotional over it.. i would have kept it to myself!! dreams are dreams... though some seems more personal... shall not take it to heart!
Decided to do some stuff for jovan... washed his moo moo clothes and his little prince mittens n booties! Plan to use them at the hospital during delivery! :) Later in the day will also start packing my maternity bag!! 32th week liao... i must get ready all the stuff by 36th week... latest is 38th! seems fast wor.. but at times i feel time is like crawling... nevertheless time will still go by!
Thinkin of my first qn i will ask Jovan...
"Does mummy look prettier on the outside (appearance) or in the inside (womb)!??" WUHAHAHHAHA... juz joking!
LAME JOKE!
Tuesday, August 25, 2009 10:52 PM
Today is the last pre-natal lesson which is a doctor's talk at Singapore Chinese Girls' School! Is a long long journey from home... but luckily still bearable! :)
Din realli like or enjoyed the talk... Guess i was too restless ba.... all i wanna do is go home and hide in my little bed and zzzz...
Today Jovan realli made his presence felt... kicking... stretching... hiccups... making me exhausted...
Jovan's kicks and punches are not no longer ticklish... they are powerful and painful!
The doctor mention,
"Does your baby zzz through the day as u cradle him during ur daily activities... but find the baby kicking the wind of you at night?"
Nodding furiously....
"Be prepared... for the first few mths... his active period will be at night... coz is in his biological clock!"
Faints!
I will start listening to cranberries's Zombie... zombie zombie...
Well... till then... 54 days more to go...
Monday, August 24, 2009 10:15 PM
Juz ytday... my msn nick was... What is fated in my life??
Today i got the answer...
"每一个孩子都是上帝牵着手来到这世界上的。。。
孕育一个生命绝对不是意外。。。
而是命中注定。。。"
This is the answer... from fate... to me...
Thursday, August 20, 2009 11:47 PM
It's a few seconds of war...
Pregnant woman verses flying baby bug...
with a few jumps... waving of newspaper...
With an accurate smack...
Little scream... Loud cheers from the side...
Pregnant woman.. Winner...
Who says big tummy people can't jump??!!
Wuhahahahaha....
Saturday, August 15, 2009 11:51 AM
Dun ask me y... but today i juz seem to be re-charged...
Someone gave me directions.. or should i say re-confirm my directions...
He reminded me things tat i long forgotten...
i dun wanna be the kind of person that takes 2 steps forward and then take 3 steps back...
These behaviours will nv bring me to places i wanna go....
I wanna be the ger that i used to be...
Trying to stay +ve... Reminding myself to break all curses...
:) Long to see my sunshine after the rain....
PS: Official start to EPL... i am sure everyone is excited!! Both sports fantics and the gamblers... lolz... enjoy pple!! I juz hope i haf scv so i can watch NOT EPL... but i wanna watch Formula 1... ARGH!
Thursday, August 13, 2009 12:22 AM
If people can't tell tat i am pregnant, it means.. to them... i am juz a super over size, fat and clumsy woman!! i weigh 60.8kg (tat was the weight 2 weeks ago) with a bulging tummy tat looks and feels like a rubber ball... with swollen cheeks and feet... in what way i dun look like a preggy woman!??
Singaporeans can be so ugly at times!! went to unisim to defer my studies for this sem and jan sem 2010 which cost me a freakin hundred over! sighz... nvm abt the $$ coz Jovan worth more than tat! :) anyway, i took the mrt train from bedok to dover... no one gave up their seat for me!! i onli manage to grab a seat at city hall... and mind me, i had a seat coz many pple alighted at that stop and i practically ran to a seat!! sighz... is tiring to carry a 30th week old foetus ard the place! it doesn't help tat he is constantly kicking and stretching... being a pro in doing the kallang wave in my tummy! it also doesn't help tat he can't tell tat his mummy is frustrated with all his movements despite her protests and scoldings... i am sure he will be a brat when he grows up!! i am embracin myself for tat...
For the returnin trip, i manage to get a seat coz my sister boareded the train at boon lay and she helped me book a seat!! LOLZ! tat was very sweet of her!! or else i might have to stand from dover to bedok... and imagine the going home crowds!! eeks!!
As i was saying, i manage to defer my studies but i was unable to defer my accounting paper tat i am due to sit for in oct! shit... the unisim officer say no matter what reason it may be, there is no deferral of a sub paper!! But very unfair... is not tat i dun wanna sit for it! i'm realli scare tat i might go into labour before i could take the paper!! well i will be sending an email to the student mgmt plus my doc letter, we shall see how things go! as what my fren n my mum say... GO FIND MP LOR! i might juz do tat... evil luff! in the meantime, i think i will juz study for the paper but first, i need to get my notes back from senja!! another trip across sin!
Think the last trimester symptoms is realli getting to me!! i get tired very easily... backaches... side cramps... swollen feet... heartburn... vomiting... imaginary labour pains... well, at times i wonder y can't i be a guy!? hmmm... i was readin an article online abt some women getting addicted to being pregnant! i doubt i will be one of them!! lolz... and i have to mention this... given my current situation, at times i would picture myself to be a surrogate mother whom receive a sperm and an egg from unknown donors!! seems very huh... but is juz a weird tot... plz dun pay attention to tat!
at times i juz hope i can bring jovan away to a place where me n my little boy can start afresh! a place where no one knows us and we know no one! but yet again, i can't... too many tings tat hold me back! plus i am sure jovan's god-MOTHERS and one or two god-fathers will hunt me down! wuhahaha... i am sure he will be loved...
GOD has plans... :)
Monday, August 10, 2009 10:26 PM
Finally my 30th week...
But everyone feels it is going fine...
No one knows... no one realli knows...
Coz i also dunno it myself...
Onli GOD himself knows e plans...
Wee Wee
